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B is for "Bees"

by Tom Jolu

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1.
Emily (Live) 04:40
Emily baby, please be good to me I can't sleep, haven't slept for days just can't get away, from that post-love haze. and my body's breaking down to tiny pieces on the ground. Your soul is frozen to the core, but I still want more. Center of your own attention, and it's plain to see that you were always playin' games. I don't even want to mention, but it breaks my heart, every time I hear your name.
2.
I guess everything I said meant nothing. I guess all my kind words, they weren't true. I guess all of my songs and my poems, and letters, were meant for someone else, and not for you. You just ate up every line. I can't deal with myself and all my lies. But you brought me to the light today. Showing me that I lied Every day. It wasn't a falling out in the end. I guess I lied I guess you're right every day. You're so damn right. You don't have to forgive me you don't have to say yes, no, Maybe so, you could just walk away. You could give me the finger and I would be fine with that fine with that fine with that either way. Every day slowly ticks on by I cannot deal with myself and all my lies. But you brought me to the light today. Showing me that I lied Every day. It wasn't a falling out in the end. I guess I lied I guess you're right every day. every day 'Cause I'm a liar, I'm a faker, I'm everything I said that I wouldn't be I'm a liar. Thank you for showing me. But you brought me to the light today. Showing me that I lied Every day. It wasn't a falling out in the end. I guess I lied I guess you're right every day. You're so damn right.
3.
Oh god it's Friday night and I'm feeling good. Things are hot and heavy, like I knew they would. I'm dreaming that this could be every day for me. I won't save myself. I'll let you break my legs if you want, you'll see. I won't save myself, 'cause in the end my worth ain't worth a damn to me. It doesn't even matter what I have to say, 'cause by tomorrow morning I'll be gone away. This meaningless sex has lost it's meaning to me. I won't save myself. I'll let you break my legs if you want, you'll see. I won't save myself, 'cause in the end my worth ain't worth a damn to me. la da da da da da da da da da da da da da I won't save myself. I'll let you break my legs if you want, you'll see. I won't save myself, 'cause in the end my worth ain't worth a damn to me.
4.
It's been a whole year since you've been away. And in all of that time, everything has changed. I've forgotten the sound of your voice when you used to yell up the stairs. But the one thing I remember is, you did what you wanted, you didn't care. They couldn't make you settle, couldn't make you settle, Settle down. In the back of my mind I remember the bracelet you wore. It was blue and had three letters D-N-R. You fought so hard You fought so long we told them all that you would win. And even though you fought so hard and fought so long... In the end I guess you did. they couldn't make you settle, Couldn't make you settle, Settle down.
5.
Wait (Live) 04:31
I'm only half as good as you ever made me feel. A super hero where the spotlight glimmers off your seat, and reveals who I am. Who I always wish to be. The agony is in your eyes, and now it's killing me. "Just wait," She whispered, as tears run down her face. "I love you, God, I hate you, but These things we can't replace." "Just stay," She screams, as you're backing up to leave. "I need you, I can't stand you, but It's better than my dreams. Just wait." I'm not one to pass a fight with words or with swords. And I refuse to weigh or measure the damage or the cost. So close your eyes and count to ten and pray that when you open them I'll be there in the end. "Just wait," She whispered, as tears run down her face. "I love you, God, I hate you, but These things we can't replace." "Just stay," She screams, as you're backing up to leave. "I need you, I can't stand you, but It's better than my dreams. Just wait."
6.
I've been working twelve hours every day, And I've been getting crumbs for my pay. When I was young this is not how I saw my life: Working every day and breaking my back, my back and all I get's a dime. Sometimes my dreams feel like they've gone to the wayside, But I ain't dead yet, so I'll keep on tryin' I don't want it I don't need it I don't wanna work these twelve hour days I'll keep dreamin' I'll keep schemein' 'till all the blood falls out my veins I want a life that's better than this, and I'll find my van, and I'll find my bliss.

credits

released December 20, 2019

Performed live at Ransom Steele Tavern on 9/28/19, except track 4, which was performed at Chenango Stage on 2/2/19

All songs written by Tom Lewis
Performed by:
Tom Lewis - Guitar, vocals
James Pilipovic - Guitar
Conor Mitchell - Bass
Phil Hazen - Saxophone
Matt Ebbers - Drums/Percussion

Production:
Engineered & Mixed by Matt Ebbers at Side Room Sounds

Special thank you to the Vestal Museum staff, the Liberty family, and the Grassroots Xpress crew for allowing us to perform, and Jess Petrylak & Nic Buttacavoli for the cover art.

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Tom Jolu New York

Bringing together elements of folk sensibilities, thoughtful lyricism and a punk rock attitude, Tom Jolu is the manifestation of singer/songwriter Tom Lewis's diverse talents. Born out of a decade of playing punk rock clubs, dive bars and basements, Tom Jolu builds on the legacy of multi-instrumentalist songwriters, crafting songs that are both simple to sing along with but layered in complexity. ... more

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